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Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Re-Animator (1985): or, Getting Ahead in Horror
Barbara Crampton Week: Episode One!
There exists, although its numbers are very few, a class of movies that approach cinematic perfection. Films in which every directorial and scriptwriting decision appears to have been the right one, in which the cast seems perfectly suited to their roles from the star right down to the nonspeaking extras, where the slightest change in editing or music or set design would necessarily be for the worse. Casablanca. The Godfather. My Life as a Dog. These movies approach the apotheosis of their genres, and stand as shining monuments of their creators' genius to which others can only aspire. Movies that are, for all intents and purposes, perfect.
Stuart Gordon's Re-Animator (1985) may well be the perfect B-movie.
If you were a horror geek coming of age in the 1980s, as I was, Re-Animator hit you like an atom bomb. With its mix of mad science, incredible effects, hilarious black humor and sex sex SEX, the movie couldn't help but impress itself inexpungably on the brains of an entire generation of horror fans. It made a horror superstar not only of its director, but an instant icon of Jeffrey Combs for his legend-making performance as Mad Scientist nonpareil Herbert West, and a Scream Queen par excellence and permanent Vicar's Happy Place-resident of Barbara Crampton as the plucky, innocent, and fearlessly naked damsel in distress Meg Halsey. It didn't hurt Richard Band's reputation as a horror-score composer, either.
Watch Closely, Now
I'd wager it's hard to be a horror fan worth your salt these days and NOT be intimately familiar with the movie's plot, but for the benefit of those under the age of twenty who've been weaned on PG-13 horrors and needless remake/reboots, here's the Readers' Digest version: kicked out of medical school in Sweden after a shocking pre-credits experiment goes awry and leads to his mentor's eyeballs exploding out of his head (could have happened to anybody), neuroscientist prodigy Herbert West (Combs) transfers to Miskatonic University in Massachusetts to continue his research. Needing a place to live and work undisturbed by prying eyes, West answers a "Roommate Wanted" ad posted by clean-cut med student Daniel Cain (Bruce Abbott), who just happens to be dating Megan (Crampton), daughter of Miskatonic U's puritanical Dean Alan Halsey (Robert Sampson). West wastes no time getting on the wrong side of the college's eminent neurosurgeon and grant-machine Dr. Carl Hill (David Gale), who also has a creepy-old-man affection for Meg. When West uses his dayglo-green chemical reagent to re-animate Dan's dead cat and draw his roommate into the wonderful world of Mad Science, it's not long before neon-accented, goopy-gory hell breaks loose.
Would You Rent a Room to This Man?
In my previous gushing review of Stuart Gordon's follow-up to Re-Animator, the also-gobsmackingly-wonderful Lovecraft-inspired From Beyond, I marveled at how Gordon never seems to waste a single frame of film, instead packing every minute of screentime with more symbolism, resonant images, and forward-thrusting fun than dozens of lesser films contain in their entire runtimes. In Re-Animator, Gordon and frequent collaborator/scriptwriter Dennis Paoli similarly hit on all cylinders, never spending time on anything that won't come pay off in spades later. The economy with which Gordon fleshes out his characters, for instance, is a master class of show-vs.-tell movie-making. In twenty minutes he's not only introduced all the principals and deftly established their motivations and eccentricities (West's mad genius, Dan's fear of/desire to conquer Death, Dr. Hill's egotistical narcissism) but he's also given us at least two memorable gore scenes--the pre-credits disaster and Dr. Hill's lecture on cranial autopsy techniques, which also wittily and wonderfully sets up West and Hill's antagonism--and a glorious love/nude scene from Ms. Crampton--a scene that also is not gratuitous, but serves to impart necessary information to the audience about her character and her relationship with Dan.
When Dan goes to Dean Halsey to tell him about West's groundbreaking discovery, the Dean's overly harsh reaction makes sense in light of his previously established puritanical bent and his feeling that no one is good enough for his daughter, least of all an irresponsible med student exposing her to a madman's experiments. His loans revoked, his relationship with Meg in a shambles, and his dream-career in jeopardy, Dan suddenly has a vested interest in helping West procure subjects for his experiments--if he can prove the prodigy has indeed conquered brain death, the Dean will have no choice but to rescind his punishments. Of course things go terribly, horrifyingly wrong in the morgue, and a rogue musclebound corpse murders the Dean before Cain and West can neutralize it. West sees the Dean as a perfect test subject, and Cain agrees because he doesn't think Meg would see him the same if she knew he was partially responsible for her dad's death.
"A mind is a terrible thing to waste...that's why I use Tupperware™"
The slavering, brain-damaged beast the Dean becomes makes Dr. Hill the Big Man on Campus, and also starts him wondering whether West really has re-created life. Blackmailing the young scientist into handing over his notes and reagent so that he can steal the glory, Hill is distracted by a microscope slide long enough to allow West to decapitate him with a shovel! (I'm going to go ahead and call a spade a Frankenstein-reference.) Unable to resist a fresh corpse, even in pieces, West injects both parts with his reagent. Of course like so many mad scientists before him, he has CREATED A MONSTER! Dr. Hill, toting his own head under his arm, escapes the scene, leading to a confrontation in the hospital that will involve an army of re-animated corpses, proof courtesy Dean Halsey of the persistence of personality after death, and the most re-wound/re-watched minute of videotape in the history of horror movies, courtesy the smokin' hawt Ms. Crampton and an absolutely monumental visual pun.
I've seen Re-Animator many, many times now (certain parts of it even more than others), and it never fails to sweep me up in its breakneck pace, amazing practical effects, and fantastic sense of gallows humor. Jeffrey Combs, in the role he was clearly BORN to play, just freaking OWNS it from frame one, investing his line readings and mannerisms with such delicious arrogance, intelligence, and MADNESS that most viewers would not be surprised to find out the actor actually had a basement full of bubbling beakers and body parts where he spends his hobby time. (He doesn't...as far as I know.) A scientific cipher for most of the movie, he inhabits the character so thoroughly that his one moment of real humanity--when in shock from the undead cat's attack, he plays an ill-timed joke on Dan and collapses in nervous laughter--is less "out of nowhere" than a surprising look behind his mask of SCIENCE. A tour de force performance than I never tire of watching.
"Now you may feel a little pressure..."
I never used to be as big a Bruce Abbott fan as many reviewers, but over my last few viewings I've come to appreciate the quiet intensity he brings to the "Everyman" role, how his desire to do good gradually leads him into more and more outrageous situations as the script's fiendishly constructed domino pattern tumbles around him. And David Gale incredibly matches Combs parry-and-thrust in the Mad Scientist Wars, making you believe that below that calm, intense surface lies a world of madness and horror just waiting to be tapped. And when it IS tapped via West's impromptu craniectomy and ill-advised chemical jump-start, you believe there's no limit to what this madman will do. And you're right.
(Deleted scenes and commentary on the special edition DVD of the film reveal that originally there was a lengthy subplot to do with Hill's Svengali-like mental powers, which enabled him to hypnotize other characters like a snake and was meant to be the explanation for his ability to think and speak post-death when everyone else became an inarticulate zombie. Gordon wisely decided that "there was enough going on in the movie already," and cut all those scenes. It's a testament to the intensity of Gale's performance that his incredible willpower is more than evident without it, and that I for one never questioned his personality survival.)
"So...do you come here often?"
I've waxed poetic (and otherwise, IYKWIM) about Barbara Crampton's performance in this movie more than once on this site, but it bears repeating: she is a wonderful actress at the top of her game here, juggling Meg's devotion to her father with her love for Dan in a believable, dramatic way--a subtlety of performance that many a lesser actress would have overlooked, opting instead to be the spoiled teenager counting her father a villain and her boyfriend a hero without further depth. She establishes her Scream Queen worthiness with several ear-piercing shrieks and facial expressions that would make Evelyn Ankers proud to call her "sister." And her bravery and devotion to the cause of practical effects-horror is well-documented. Barbara, I love you. You made me the man I am today.
"Vicar, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Re-watching the flick for this review, I picked up on a lot of images and techniques that had escaped me before. Gordon never misses an opportunity for a resonant image and often quotes early scenes later in the movie to subtle but wonderful effect. For instance, in Meg and Dan's initial love scene, Dan pulls the covers up over his head and rises from the bed like a sheet-covered corpse; it's all playful and giggly here (though Meg is clearly disturbed as she laughs), but of course is a direct foreshadowing of later events, when Meg will be similarly menaced. More fun that that one are the trio of "Wall Splat" scenes--first when Dan flings his zombie cat against the wall, directly echoed by the muscular zombie tossing Dean Halsey at the bricks (even down to the blood spot!), and capped by the zombified Halsey pitching Hill's head at the wall like a fastball! If you don't cheer every time, get out of my club. And a regular recurrence of extremely effective over-the-shoulder POV shots serves to put the viewer in a given character's place, further immersing the audience in the film.
I said at the beginning of this rave that Re-Animator may be the perfect B-movie, and I stand by that. The essence of a B-movie, in my opinion, involves its bigger-than-life intensity, its ability to excite, thrill, and perhaps terrify, and a certain childlike glee that would seem indecorous in an A-list feature. Re-Animator has all these in spades, and its sheen has not dulled in the twenty or so times it's passed my eyeballs. Of course there's no accounting for taste, and there may well be some of you out there who don't understand all the hubbub I and other fans make over a silly little sci-fi/horror movie from the 80s, pointing out occasionally iffy effects (like the cat-puppet and Dr. Hill's dickey-o-flesh), questionable motivations ("Overdose theory"? WTF?), and the like. If so, allow me to take this opportunity to say: fuck you.
"Okay, I take it back! You DO have the guts!"
To rate this movie properly, I would need to collect all the thumbs ever lost in shop classes and industrial accidents, stitch them all togehter into some kind of gigantic Koosh-style Thumb Ball, and inject it with Herbert West's reagent to set it a-wigglin'. In short, Off the Thumb Scale. Watch it again; you won't be sorry.
"That's all, folks!"
Come back Wednesday for Crampton Week, Episode Two: The Duke of DVD's take on another Gordon/Combs/Crampton mmmmmasterpiece!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
School of Death (1975): or, What About Bob?
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Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Thicker Than Water (2008): or, Send Me a Postcard from Macchu Picchu
Mircrobudget independent vampire movies (MIVMs) get a bad rap generally, and if you think about it, there's a pretty good reason. As cheap and easy as it is to squirt some bottled latex in a friend's face, tear up some old clothes, layer on some corpse paint and call him a zombie, it's even cheaper to pencil in some eyeliner and call him a vampire. (And if you or your friends are part of your local Goth scene, the overhead goes down even more.) Because the setup requires less money and less skill, unfortunately the MIVM has attracted the most inept, unoriginal, creatively bankrupt independent filmmakers of any genre. The fact that the built-in audience for vampire movies of any level of quality still greedily devours everything that hits the DVD shelves with a half-naked Goth chick on the cover does little to discourage this trend.
As a result, it's often difficult for a horror fan with any level of discernment to find a MIVM that they could actually call...you know...kind of good. Like trying to find the proverbial toothpick in a stake-stack...or something. That's why your ever-lovin' Vicar was suprised and pleased to find that Phil Messerer's 2008 MIVM, Thicker than Water: The Vampire Diaries Part 1 (official site here), is actually more than a few cuts above its mini-budgeted brethren. Well shot with an engaging amateur cast and even a few (dare I say it?) original ideas to offer, it's definitely a MIVM worth checking out, if you're into that sort of thing.
And you are. Don't lie. I know you.The movie kind of digs itself a hole right at the beginning, as a trying-to-sound-creepy but-failing-miserably narrator intones "OUR STORY BEGINNNNS...." while still photos of Mayan pyramids flash by onscreen. Not still photos, actually--I think they're honest-to-God postcards. The voice-over says something about Mayan gods and their insatiable thirst for blood, but I was too awash in the slideshow to care. Luckily things get better, as we're next presented with a well-crafted tableau of dolls and bones that gives us a capsule visual summary of the movie to come.
The New Groovy Goth Girls™ Playset
After the credits we meet soon-to-be 16-year-old Goth girl Lara Baxter (Eilis Cahill), who has constructed a black magic altar in her room as a way of escaping from her dysfunctional family--mainly from her "twin" sister Helen (Devon Bailey), a popular cheerleader sort who enjoys ratting on Lara to their ultra-religious Mom (JoJo Hristova). (Upon seeing Lara's altar: "Mom! Lara's playing Anne Rice again!") Rounding out the family unit are henpecked Dad (Anthony Morelli) and reclusive weirdo brother Raymond (Michael Strelow), who also happens to be an independent researcher (read: Mad Scientist).The story is told mostly from Lara's point of view, with periodic voice-overs by Cahill as she writes in the titular diary. From the opening dinner scene, where super-stern Mom enforces "Accomplishment Time," demanding each child list his or her achievements for the week, we know Messerer is aiming over the top and plans to stay there. Often this is an excuse for dumb jokes and poor writing, but thankfully Messerer (who also wrote the script) has an ear for a good line and an actress in Cahill who can deliver withering sarcasm in a funny, engaging way.
Lara: The Only Goth in the Village
After Dad announces he and Mom are separating, he completely disappears from the movie, leading me to wonder why the character was even there in the first place. In the tension-filled aftermath of this and a double-birthday party gone awry, a sibling scuffle leads Lara to cast an "Ancient Anal Acne" spell on her sister. She figures she got the ingredients wrong when the next morning Helen comes downstairs bleeding profuseley from the nose and eyes. A tearful deathbed reconciliation later and Helen is a corpse, leaving Lara guilt-wracked and the rest of the family in shock.I don't want to belabor the plot too much, so instead I'll sum up. Helen comes back from the dead Monkey's Paw-style, only now she's a vampire (try not to look so surprised). The family decides to do their best to keep her alive, which means kidnapping unwitting victims and sacrificing them to Helen's cyclical bloodlust. While Lara educates them (and us) on the niceties of vampire lore, Raymond experiments in his bedroom lab in a search for a cure, or at least an explanation. Mom wrestles with her religious beliefs and the need to keep her daughter alive.
Bet you wish they'd tested that makeup on bunnies *now,* dontcha?
The focus in the movie is really on the family dynamic rather than on the "vampire run amok" idea, and this is to its strength, I think. Helen is kept hidden in the basement like a dirty family secret, while her family becomes kidnappers and murderers in order to keep her alive. Helen is by no means an Anne Rice-ian vampire as most MIVM characters become, but rather a scared, confused teen with uncontrollable impusles (we've all been there, right?) who occasionally becomes a monster. Again, I think this is an interesting angle--in fact, late in the movie an Anne Rice vampire does appear to claim Helen in a funny (if a bit too broad) comic scene, only to find he's drastically underestimated the Baxter family.The movie is shot pretty well, with some nice dark shadows and a few good mise-en-scenes. The makeup and effects are understated for the most part--dark eyeliner and lots of fake blood--but occasionally graphic, and we even get an exploding head courtesy Raymond's experiments, which is always a treat.
"Helloooo!"
I mentioned Cahill's performance as Lara earlier, and it really is rather good--on the sliding scale of MIVM acting, anyway. She's engaging and funny, and really seems to inhabit the character (or else the character *is* her, which works just as well). Bailey does a pretty good job as Helen too, but the real show stealer is Strelow as Raymond, who takes the opportunity of his sister's first death to tell Mom he's gay and afterwards transforms gradually from shy reclusive nerd to svelte, confident gay vampire killer.
Messerer's script has some funny lines in it, and while he occasionally skirts the "too broad and stupid" comic line, he seldom goes over it. There are some scenes that don't work in my opinion--everything that uses a postcard for a background, for a start, and the out-of-place expository scene with the Dr. Strange-type owner of the local Freakatorium shop--but there are also scenes that work really, really well, such as an extended conversation with some door-to-door Mormons the Baxters have chosen for Helen's next meal (my favorite set-piece). There are also a couple of well-edited montages that I found funny and fun to watch.I have to say that when I first received the screener, I was quite prepared to dislike this movie, and one of the reasons was the title--that is, the FULL title, which is this: Thicker Than Water: The Vampire Diaries, Part 1. I still don't like it, for three reasons. Number one: when it comes to indie movie titles, shorter is better imo. "Thicker than water" is a well-known phrase, implies the "blood" without coming out and saying it, and is easy to remember. Adding that lengthy subtitle just dilutes it. Number two: there is really no need to announce the proposed franchise until at least the second installment. Yeah, we all know you have big plans for your baby, but so did the guys behind Buckaroo Banzai and The Sword and the Sorcerer. And number three: there's already a Vampire Diary. Sorry guys, but you've been scooped.
No more, mon.
That said, I was pleasantly surprised by Thicker than Water, and entertained by it pretty much throughout. I did think Lara's centrality to the plot should have been maintained; she starts off very strong, but by the end she seems a secondary character. I wasn't a huge fan of the music in the movie, but it won awards for it at some festival or other, so what do I know.
Anyway, if you're a fan of MIVMs, you could do lots, LOTS worse than Thicker Than Water. I will admit that those not already aficionados of microbudget movies might not be able to get into it as I did, but on the sliding scale us fans learn to apply, it does rather well, with some good ideas, a refreshing sense of humor, and periodically effective filming. Taking a page from the Duke's book, I give the movie 2 thumbs if you love MIVMs and vampires generally, and 1.5 if you don't.
Paper Plates are the Scientist's Friend
You can visit Thicker Than Water's Official Site here.
Friday, July 3, 2009
5 Dolls for an August Moon (1970), Or How I Was Confused But At Least Edwige Was Nekkid
Gentle readers, it is I, the Duke, and I simply must make a confession: I do not know what Mario Bava looks like. That's right, I've never seen a picture of him. You exclaim with horror, "Duke! You have a shrine dedicated to Bava in your house! You have 7 pairs of "Mario Bava Does It Mod" thong underwear! How could you not know what this man looks like?!"
I would answer you thusly: I don't have to look, because I already know. In my mind's eye, Mario Bava is a graying old letch, who wears camel-hair smoking jackets at all times, and usually can be seen smoking a pipe. His black eyes can disintegrate panties at 100 paces, and his weathered hands are at all times either cupping a breast or a glass of 50 year old port. (sometimes both) Mario Bava is my hero, and not simply because he made passionate movies with a passion, but because he has bedded every single hot Eurobabe who ever walked the planet between 1960 and 1980, usually three at a time.
Let us examine, shall we, one of Bava's lesser seen films, the great ultra-mod 1970's murder mystery "5 Dolls for an August Moon". 5 Dolls indeed! I sat agog at the sheer amount of super hot Eurobabe flesh on display throughout this picture. Bava went all out on casting this one, and his attention to detail with regards to smoking hot busty broads must once again be applauded.
First, let's set the scene. The film takes place entirely on an island, ostensibly somewhere in the Mediterranean. 4 couples have come to stay at the home of the extremely horny and mostly ugly George Stark and his babe of a wife Jill. First we have Nick, who likes to affect blue sunglasses, and his wife Marie, played by the Vicar's and everyone else's favorite Eurobabe Edwige Fenech. Next up is Jack and his hot wife Peggy, and finally Professor Fritz and his lesbian wannabe wife Trudy.
The final piece of the puzzle is the smoking hot, holy-shit-I-hope-she's-18 Isabel, a blue-eyed, blonde bombshell that no doubt spent most of her time during filming inside Bava's trailer. Isabel belongs to no one that I can discern, and simply is. She becomes important later. First, we have a party to attend!
"Dig those crazy cats, momma!"
The movie opens with what you would assume all parties in 1970 were like: mod furniture that includes crazy lamps, silly chairs shaped like eggs, vases shellacked with weird colors, and people sitting around dressed in jackets and sweaters, sipping drinks and not talking. Everyone is doing this but Marie, who has the boogie in her butt and isn't afraid to show it. Perhaps I should say the boogie is in her breasts, as she quickly gyrates out of her dress down to a bustier and skirt and begins shimmying around the room as Bava quickly zooms the camera in and out repeatedly, Wayne's World style.
Makes you want to sit up and beg for buttermilk, doesn't it?
George gets up and cuts a rug with her briefly, before he gets the bright idea to play a parlor game. This game involves tying Marie up to a coffee table made from actual drift wood and then each guest taking a knife, I suppose to simulate stabbing her in sacrifice to the god Kraal, which George apparently made up on the spot. Suddenly the lights go out, and when they come back on it appears Marie is stabbed for real! Only, it's a joke, perpetrated by whom we never really know, except Marie is somehow in on it. Disjointed happenings like this become the norm in this movie rather quickly.
It seem Fritz is the target of this little get-together. George, Nick, and Jack are all trying to buy Fritz's secret scientific formula, which we finally find out is nothing more than a new industrial resin. WTF? I gaped at this revelation. Couldn't have been a new non-nutritive cereal varnish, or something you could sprinkle on your lawn to keep gypsies away (note that the Duke will pay vast sums for this). It was just a lame industrial resin.
At any rate, Fritz is offered $1 million from each of the men, but he refuses. Why he refuses is never quite clear, perhaps he's just holding out for more. This makes Jack, Nick, and George quite angry, but the are resolute in their agreement to strip Fritz of his secret formula post haste.
Ladies and Gentlemen: Edwige Fenech
Meanwhile, Nick's wife Marie is off sleeping with Jacques the "houseboy". After making out on a speeding boat (seriously, no one was driving... some people are more brave than the Duke), Marie goes to meet up with Jacques for even more hanky of the panky later that night. Upon arriving, she finds Jacques dead via knife in the back. She runs down the beach in horror, only to finally stop, give a little stretch and a sigh, and then return to the house, not telling anyone about Jacques.
Later, someone apparently dumped Jacques body in the water, because it washes up on shore to the horror of Jill, who promptly tells everyone else. Attempts to reach the mainland fail, so the guys drag Jacques into the deep freeze, wrap him in plastic, and hang him up like a side of beef. What else were they supposed to do, pray tell?! Everyone retires to the main room, where Nick confesses that death makes him feel dirty and promptly washes his hands with J&B! I found this to be supremely cool, and will employ it during my day-to-day life beginning immediately.
This room was decorated by either Louis the XIV or Elton John.
Marie confesses to Nick that she slept with Jacques. Instead of outrage, Nick asks her to do the same with the Professor in hopes of scoring his formula. She tries this, wearing a hot number consisting of a red bra and panties, all the while laying on one of those round rotating beds (seriously, what's the point of those anyway?), but Fritz is an oak that will not bend. In fact, Fritz burns his formula papers. Why isn't clear, but I suppose he doesn't want them to fall into the wrong hands.
Meanwhile, Trudy starts making lesbonic innuendo towards Jill, George's wife. Unfortunately this doesn't go ANYWHERE and I give Bava a momentary frown because of this. The Professor decides to take a walk on the beach, when Isabel suddenly shoots him! Trudy and Jill come running, find the body, and go to get help. While they are gone, Isabel drags the body off to somewhere, we're not sure.
"So, uh, after the sex, then more sex... right?"
At this point it looks like Isabel is the rabid killer. It makes sense, but then it doesn't. Actually, this whole movie makes very little sense. It's like Bava watched "10 Little Indians" and shamelessly ripped it off, only he left out the parts that make sense. Back at the house, everyone suspects Trudy is the killer. Nick tries to slap her, only she grabs his hand and flips him over, Karate Kid style!
"It's a Prell kind of day!"
Meanwhile, Jack is sexing his wife Peggy, who walks out on the back porch while Jack is washing the love stink off his nethers. Jack gets out of the shower and goes to check on her, only she's been shot in the head! Elsewhere, the others discover Marie sexily stabbed and tied to a tree, dead! This really gets everyone going, the paranoia kicking into overdrive.
"I didn't stab her! Okay, I did, but not with this knife."
Even more bizarrely, George's wife is found dead in her bath of an apparent suicide. This causes everyone left to gather in the great room, where the guys play chess while Trudy makes an audio recording saying who is left and that one of them is a killer. Everyone gets into a fight, and finally Jack reveals himself as the killer of most everyone, according to him, except for the Professor.
A glimpse into the Burger King test kitchen.
Jack goes to get some microfilm that is hidden in the ring on someone's finger, at this point the plot is so messed up I lost count of what was going on. Somehow Trudy is in on it with Jack, they double cross each other and basically shoot each other inside the deep freeze. Only Isabel is left alive. She gathers up the $1 million checks, and leaves.
Ladies and Gentlemen: The Accidentally Inappropriate Carrot.
We flash-forward to later and Isabel, wearing obviously nicer clothes, is walking into a prison. Inside the prison is... The Professor! He's alive, though somehow in jail?! Isabel reveals that she "shot" him with a tranq dart instead of a bullet. I guess somehow the Professor is blamed for all the murder, though how isn't explained. In fact, nothing at all is explained. The movie ends with the Professor in jail and Isabel riding off in a Rolls. Fin.
"Does the term 'jail bait' mean anything to you, Professor?"
Despite the WTF-ness of the plot, this movie is almost worth watching for one reason: Babes. Specifically, babes of the European set. Collect them all, I say. Edwige is put on display a bit, but sadly not enough in my opinion. Bava missed a lot of opportunity to display the goods, of all the women for that matter, but sadly it just wasn't enough.
In the end, I was mildly disappointed with this movie. It did have a lot going for it. Kooky 70's furniture and lingo. Sexy women on an island. Dead bodies piling up in a deep freeze. Sadly, the plot holes coupled with the obviously lack of extreme nudity, not to mention the lesbian tension that goes nowhere, just adds up to 1 Thumb Up I'm afraid. 2 Thumbs Up if you like 70's mod furniture.
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